Don’t Talk to Strangers

I remember when I was younger being told not to talk to strangers.  It was my mother’s attempt at keeping me out of harm’s way.  No doubt you’ve been given the same bit of advice while you were growing up.  Maybe you were told not to take candy from a stranger or never to accept a ride from a stranger.  All of this was great advice when we were children however we are no longer vulnerable to the danger of strangers yet we still cling to this advice subconsciously.

During a recent hike I noticed something strange.  Each person I passed behaved in the same manner; avoiding eye contact & looking away.  There were some exceptions, those who offered a nervous smile or muffled “Hello”, but the vast majority did their best to avoid any sort of interaction.

I was curious, as well as guilty of this behavior, so I decided to conduct a highly scientific experiment.  I would make eye contact with each person I passed and maintain it as long as they allowed, but would not say “Hello”.  My hypothesis was that by making eye contact more people would feel obligated to acknowledge me. 

Soon I realized that this was not the way things were going to work out.  As a matter of fact, nothing changed.  People still offered an occasional smile but the vast majority averted their eyes choosing instead to look at the ground.  Out of the 100 people whom I passed, one actually said “Hello”.  This only includes the people I counted.  I didn’t start counting until halfway through my hike and gave up after 100 people.

I began to wonder about this phenomenon.  Is this a result of our upbringing?  Our culture?  Are we simply too important/busy/distracted to inconvenience ourselves with acknowledging a complete stranger?  Maybe, though I have reached a different conclusion.

Tourists.  Throughout my travels I have noticed that my interactions with the people who are local to the area are genuinely kind and helpful.  No matter where I am, domestic or international, I have been surprised by how friendly the local people are.  I’ve even been offered a ride by someone I had met only minutes earlier in a foreign country in order to find a store where I could buy clothes as my luggage had been lost by the airline. 

Yet it seems that whenever I am in a decidedly touristy area, the people act the same, as if they are afraid of something.  Afraid of interaction.  It seems that they are there solely for the purpose of being in the place they saw in the magazines without concern to anyone else.

I am guilty of this behavior as much as the next person, but as I continue to travel & spend time with people from across the country & world, I realize that it is much more than seeing all of the beautiful places.  It is fun to interact with the people from wherever you are visiting.  Many are interesting, some colorful and others a bit quirky, but you gain perspective from these people.  They are also a wealth of information which you will never get from any tourist book.