The ideal body.

We all want to have it, and to have one pressed against our own. I know I certainly do. But what is the “ideal body?” And shouldn’t we just be happy with ourselves the way we are? Isn’t it the media who’s to blame for our insecurities about the way we look? If they’d just use “normal” people in their advertisements instead of those flawless models…then we’d all be happy with our bodies, right?

Maybe I’ve been brainwashed by the media about what it means to be beautiful, desirable, and sexy because it’s exactly this idealized version of beauty that’s presented by the media that I desire. I want to have the perfect body that’s splashed across the magazines. It’d be nice to be the guy at the beach that the ladies are drooling over, but that’s not why I want that body, not really. When I look at myself in the mirror, I’m not happy with what I see. I want to be able to look at myself and say, “Damn, you look great!” I want to feel good about how I look naked. That’s my motivation.

I’ve always been insecure about my body. When I was a teenager, I avoided going to the lake with friends because I didn’t want to be seen without a shirt. I was scrawny, and it was embarrassing. Since then, I’ve managed to gain weight…on my ass, thighs, and belly. Okay. I got fat, but I wasn’t overweight. Ironic, especially considering that I’d also acquired A-cup man boobs (that I tried to pass off as pecs…ah, the lies we tell ourselves.)

“Skinny fat.” That’s how I’d describe myself…a tall version of the Pillsbury Doughboy.

As adorable as the Pillsbury Doughboy might be, I’ll be damned if I’m going to have people poking me in the belly expecting me to giggle. But, like most people, I didn’t do much to change. I still ate like shit, and worked out infrequently…just enough to perpetuate my belief (read: lie) that I was “trying to change.”

Only about a year ago did I really begin to realize that I was bullshitting myself about my efforts to change. So I tried a little harder, and made some progress, losing about 25 pounds. But I still hated the way I looked. Even though I’d lost all that weight, I still looked like a sissy without any muscle definition. When I ran, my flabby chest and belly shook like a bowl of JELL-O in an earthquake, even though I was at a healthy weight with a body fat percentage bordering on “athletic.”

About a month ago I began looking for a solution to my skinny fat dilemma, and found that I wasn’t the only person with this problem. Actually, it’s quite common in our society, especially amongst women. Because women don’t want to ”bulk up” from lifting weights, they avoid lifting heavy, opting instead to spend hours upon hours doing cardio. Seems this is actually counterproductive to their goal of toning up and looking sexy in a bikini. Even though I wasn’t too interested in looking sexy in a bikini, I saw the flaws I was making in my own workouts. Too much cardio, and not enough lifting.

And my diet? Not enough protein, and too much…shit. I quit drinking soda, and began to tighten my diet. I’ve been at this now for about three weeks, and have seen noticeable changes in my body. In another month, I expect the results to really begin to show.

But what’s this have to do with you?

I’m not any different than a million other people when it comes to my relationship with food and exercising. I love to eat like shit, and I hate to work out. But you know, the more I do it, the less I hate it. I’ve reached a point where I’m beginning to see the results of my efforts, and I want to know how much further I can push myself. I used to tell myself lies about my efforts in the gym and in the kitchen. I thought I was doing everything I could, but I wasn’t. Don’t bullshit yourself. Even though a lot of this post focused on physical appearance, it’s your health and fitness that really matter. It’s more than just a sexy body.

Take care of yourselves!