Where Do Our Dreams Go?

The following article originally appeared at Do You Dave Ramsey.

Do you remember when you were younger, and filled with wild ambitions?

Maybe you thought you’d climb Mount Everest, or find the cure for cancer. When you grew up, it was your dream to become a fashion designer for Hollywood celebrities. As time passed and you got a little older, those dreams slowly began fading away. At the time, you probably didn’t even notice. Now, the reality  in which you find yourself is far from what you’d envisioned as a child.

The dreams are dead.

Still, some days we catch ourselves daydreaming about what might have been…if only we had done something different. If only we’d done something else. Something better. If only we’d have chased our dreams. Who knows what might have been. The sky was the limit.

Today we’re working at jobs we hate to pay for shit we don’t really want. We hate don’t like our boss, and our co-workers annoy us. Our jobs are so simple a monkey should be doing them. “Did I really go to college for this?” you ask yourself as you sip your cup of luke-warm coffee, thinking about that better life we could’ve had. If only…

It doesn’t take long before you’re reminded why you’re still shuffling your feet through the door of your miserable job. There are student loans, car loans, mortgages, and credit cards to pay. Not only do we have all of this debt to pay for, we also have to keep up with the Joneses. Expensive vacations to exotic locations, fancy clothes, and dinners at the finest restaurants.

This is why we continue to force ourselves through another workweek, feeling like slaves to our employer…to a paycheck. But the reality is that we’re slaves to no one other than ourselves. We’re the ones who built the walls of debt that imprison us, and we’re the ones who are shoveling the ground out from beneath our feet as we continue spending.

It’s no wonder our goals seem so far away. So distant. So impossible.

If you’re looking for something more from life than what you have today, you have the power to make it happen. You decide what the future will be. It will take hard work, dedication, and sacrifice. If you want the freedom to chase your dreams, you’ll have to change your life in profound ways.

If you use debt as an excuse for why you can’t do something, eliminate it. If you don’t think you’re smart enough, educate yourself. Maybe you want to climb a mountain but aren’t in any condition to do so. Get your ass to the gym and start getting in shape. Whatever your excuse, stop letting it get in the way of your dreams and your success.

If we don’t take matters into our own hands to do everything we can to make our lives the way we want them to be, things will never change. It will never get any better. There will always be exceptions to the rules, those who get lucky, but why rely on luck when you already have the ability to change your life?

You have to decide what you want more, the life you have now or the life you’ve always dreamt of having. Even though it may feel like you’re against insurmountable odds, with enough hard work and determination you can accomplish anything you set your mind to.

Live the dream.

Coloring Outside the Lines

Our lives are a work of art.

Each day, a new stroke of color added upon the canvas of our lives; the bright colors representing good times and the muted colors, times of struggle.  As our lives play out, the picture changes; a seamless metamorphosis into the person we are today.  Our lives are a canvas, yet we treat them more like a coloring book, always careful not to slip across predetermined societal boundaries.  We follow the rules and try to live up to other people’s expectations, sacrificing our identity and ignoring our authentic selves.

But our life hasn’t always been this way.

As a child, we ignored the lines in our coloring books; they presented no resistance to our crayons.  We scribbled and laughed, free to create without limitation.  As we got a little older, our parents taught us the “proper” coloring technique.  They praised us for staying inside the lines and our desire for affirmation killed our passion.  From then on  we restrained our enthusiasm and creativity, coloring diligently within the lines so that we might please our parents.

This was our first lesson in conformity: stay in the lines, follow the rules.

Things haven’t changed much since that first lesson.  Today we’re expected to assimilate at work and in our community.  There isn’t room for creativity and individuality.  We’re expected to follow the rules; go to college so that we might have a great career, settle down with a nice girl, get married and have 2.2 children.

It’s all anyone expects of you…but what if this isn’t the life you want for yourself?

It’s your life…paint your canvas however you wish.  If that means stepping outside of the box to find happiness, it’s time to do it.  Forget about the social expectations.  You weren’t born into this world for the pleasure and satisfaction of other people.  You don’t have to follow society’s rules and there’s no reason to buckle under the pressure to conform.  Be yourself, do what you love, be who you want to be and find happiness in your own way.  Erase the social restrictions that have been imposed upon you.

You don’t have to stay inside the lines.  Live life on your own terms and by your own guiding principles.  Life is too short to live according to someone else’s wishes.

“If a man loses pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured, or far away.” ~ Henry David Thoreau

One Hundred Ways to Change Your Life

Make big plans.  Take big risks.  Question the status quo.  Understand that safety is an illusion.  Push beyond what you think you’re capable of.  Work hard.  Persevere.    Move with a sense of urgency.  Be purposeful in your actions.  Connect with people who can help you.  Build a support network.  Never give up.  Sacrifice.  Ignore trivial bullshit.  Ignore drama.  Learn to say no.  Say yes more often.  Put yourself in uncomfortable situations.  Challenge yourself.  Don’t be afraid to fail.  Persist.  Breathe.  Be grateful for life and everything you have.  Don’t worry about what’s missing.  Appreciate what is.

If you hate something, change it.  If it’s broken, fix it.  If it’s unnecessary, get rid of it.  Find what’s holding you back and remove it from your life.  Find opportunities to make your life meaningful.  Volunteer.  Donate blood.  Reach out to a friend and repair wounded relationships.  Forgive someone.  Give money to the homeless without concern of them using it to buy booze.  Hug someone.  Smile at a stranger.  Hold open the door for a pretty girl.  Tell your son that you love him, even if he wrinkles his nose at you.

Take a class for the sake of learning.  Struggle through a challenging book.  Learn something new each day.  Teach someone how to do something.  Buy lunch for the next person in line.  Tell them to Pay it Forward.  Take off your shoes and walk through the grass.  Smell the air.  Watch a squirrel collect nuts.  Fly a kite.  Take a walk.  Spend a few moments listening to nothing.  Turn off your cell phone.  Buy a plane ticket to a place you’ve never heard of.  Love.  Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today.

Bake cookies.  Take a bubble bath in the dark.  Relax.  Enjoy the moment.  Lose track of time.  Forget about tomorrow.  Stop living in the past.  Accept things as they are.  Give up control.  Commit to something.  Back out of something else.  Make a promise.  Tell someone a secret but don’t expect them to keep it.  Share a painful story with someone you love.  Don’t tell lies.  Always be honest.  Live life by your own standards of success.  Follow your morals.  Do what you think is right.  Laugh.

Dress sexy for your man.  Be her knight in shining armor.  Light candles.  Cook a meal together.  Snuggle.  Watch a lame 80′s movie.  Kiss passionately.  Write love letters to each other.  Remind yourself why you fell in love in the first place.  Tickle each other’s feet.  Give her a massage.

Get healthy.  Try yoga.  Sign up to participate in a 5k.  Participate!  Stop drinking soda.  Become a Vegan.  Do a hundred push-ups.  Exercise for half an hour each day.  Dance.  Listen to the birds chirping.  Feel the warmth of the sun on your face.  Pet a stranger’s dog.  Live!

The possibilities of your life are limited by your own imagination.  Dream big, achieve big.  Think small and flounder in mediocrity.